How to Use Rubbers and Jelly to Help Prevent AIDS

Use of Condoms

Reseach has shown that herpes virus and cytomegalovirus (CMV) annot get through a latex condom. It is reasonable to assume the same is true of the AIDS virus (HTLV-III/LAV). (Since there is no data on condoms made of animal tissue, these are not recommended.) When condoms fail to prevent sexually transmitted diseases, the reason is generally failure to use condoms properly.

Tips on Condom Use

1. Buy good quality latex condoms.
2. Put on when erection first occurs.
3. Leave space at tip of condom for semen.
4. Use a non-greasy lubricant - preferably a spermicidal jelly. Vaseline, Crisco, etc. can damage the rubber.)
5. Hold the top of the condom when withdrawing to keep it from coming off. 6. Dispose of condom safely - put into plastic bag and seal bag.

Use of Spermicidal Jellies

Most spermicidal jelly contains *nonoxynol-9* which has been shown to inactivate the AIDS virus in laboratory tests. Thus, use of nonoxynol-9-containing jelly for lubrication during vaginal or anal intercourse, or nutual masturbation, provides added protection. The jelly is usually called "contraceptive jelly" on the label and is found in drug stores next to condoms and/or feminine hygiene products. Note: DO NOT RELY ON JELLY ALONE FOR INTERCOURSE; use it IN ADDITION to condom (for men) or diaphragm (for women).

Some common brands and their nonoxynol-9 content:

Brand of Contraceptive Jelly Concentration of Nonoxynol-9

There is no guarentee that these measures will absolutely prevent AIDS, but they should cut down on the risk considerably. The most important preventive measures are to cut down on the number of sexual partners and modify sexual activities so that there is no exchange of bodily fluids. Use of rubbers and jelly should help in addition, until such time as we can know for sure who is and who is not a carrier for AIDS.

Remember: Almost all AIDS is caught from healthy carriers who have no idea that they are infectious.

Condoms: Gay Men Try Them On For Size

"I don't know how to use these things," one of the men in the test said. "I've never tried a rubber in my life, and it shows. I can't even put one on."

The frustrated man was one of the seven asked by the AIDS Committee of Toronto to try using condoms and tell us how they worked. Many gay men have never tried them before, including all of our testers. So it was a new experience for them and some were more successful than others.

It must be emphasized that there aren't any guarentees. Nobody knows for sure that a condom is going to prevent AIDS, but the chances are fairly good. We do know they are tested by various means, including filling samples with water to see if they leak, or by inflating them with air and checking for defects. And we know that water and air molecules are about 1,000 times smaller than, say a herpes virus, so it's unlikely for such a virus to pass through.

When we definitely find out what causes AIDS, then more definite advice can be determined. In the meantime, however, we can say that condoms probably helps prevent AIDS, as well as all sorts of other sexuall transmitted diseases, like gonorrhea, syphillis, and hepatitis.

But thinking that the use of a condom might be a good thing and actually using one are two different matters. That's what out testers found out, at every step of the way, from buying them to rolling them on.

First, your corner drugstore. When you get there, you'll find a lot of different packages featuring soft-focus photos featuring heterosexual couples. That is not much help, but neither is much of the information printed on the boxes. Lubricated, non-lubricated? Sensi-shaped, resevoir tip, lambskin membrane? What's the difference?

The first thing to remember is that you're a gay man, these things weren't made for you, and you're using someone else's toys. Don't avoid a package simply because it looks more heterosexual. In fact, one of the most neutral- looking, the one containing Fourex Quatr-X, had no photo on it at all and seemed the least offensive to gay men, but fared the worst in both tests conducted by our gay volunteers and in tests conducted by Canadian Consumer magazine in 1982.

One of our testers had a lot of trouble buying his condoms. "I've been out of the closet for years, and I don't have any problems dealing with sexual matters, but I just couldn't buy them. It all seemed so silly somehow, so heterosexual."

The only advice for this situation is to get over it. Who cares that you're buying these things? It's certainly not the business of the staff in the store, and they sell enough condoms in a week that they're not going to be phased one bit. Force yourself to ask a clerk where the condoms are. Once you've done that, spend as much time as you want perusing and making up your mind.

The next thing to do is to go home and try them out. On yourself. Alone. Condoms do take some getting used to, and you can't expect them to work if you are testing them out for the first time during a sexual encounter. Three of out testers were asked to try them alone, and even then they found various problems getting used to their new toys. Unfortunately, they don't come with instructions.

"First, I unrolled one and then tried to put it on," said Bill. "Big mistake. Then I figured out that you are supposed to place it on the end of your penis and unroll it onto the penis. But the second time, I got the nipple backwards and it didn't go on. Finally, I figured out that you're supposed to place it on the end of the cock, with the nipple sticking out, and then roll it on."

And it worked, but not the best. Bill found the condom to be too baggy, and it bunched and moved around a lot. This was, in fact, the most common problem encountered by our testers.

One solution might be the use of Ramses Snug-fit brand. This is different than the ramses regular brand, and was prefered by most of our test group.

Canadian Consumer magazine conducted a test in October, 1982, of ten of the most common brands of condoms available. The nine mode of rubber latex were ranked "acceptable." Fourex Quatr-X was deemed "unacceptable" due to leakage. The gay men in our test found it less than acceptable, too.

The main problem is the size -- they're just too big and baggy. In addition, some people don't like the odor.

As for the other nine condoms, nobody can tell you which one will work best for you. Some of our testers, for example, prefered the ribbed variety. Others thought that a condom should be as unobstrusive as possible, and ribs prevented that. In other words, you have to be the judge.

Other problems reported? Some people said they didn't like the smell of the latex condoms, but more than half of our testers didn't mind. One person unrolled a condom too far and got a pubic hair caught in it. "It was a very sharp pain," he said, "so I was more careful the next time."

All of them found the lubrication to be insufficient, so they had to use their own. A very important point: only use water soluable lubricants, like K-Y, because petroleum- based products weaken the condoms made of latex.

Then there's the sexual stimulation. Almost all of our testers loved rolling them on to partners and found this sort of playing around to be quite fun. Some of them also liked them for oral sex, but those who didn't try that siad that they wouldn't want to, and to reduce their risk of AIDS would simply avoid swallowing cum.

As for anal sex, which is the type of activity that you'd most likely want to use them for, the results varied. Those who were getting fucked didn't seem to mind at all. For those doing the fucking, the fact is that condoms do reduce sensation somewhat. Some of the testers just couldn't reach orgasm, but that was probably due to the fact that it was their first time using them, and they hadn't tried them during solitary masturbation beforehand.

In a recent "Advice" column in The Advocate magazine, Pat Califia responded to a gay man who wrote that "my spirit is willing, but my flesh is weak." He tried to use condoms for the first time with a trick, but couldn't maintain an erection.

Califia wrote: "Wear a rubber the next time you are jacking off. Don't try to come in it -- in fact, the first few times you try this, take it off before you come. It might also help to read some porn that includes men using rubbers.

"When you can successfully masturbate while wearing a condom, try wearing one at least part of the time you are with a partner. Remember, it takes time to change any sexual pattern, so if you have problems keeping an erection, take the performance pressure off. Either revert to masturbation or just remove the rubber util your erection returns. It might be sexyif your partner was wearing one as well and did some mutual exhibition and j/o with you.

"Eventually, the rubber won't bother you ... so keep trying -- just don't expect instant perfection."

The last hurdle is introducing them during sex. At some point, you're going to have to say that you want to use a condom, and it's not unlikely that your partner hasn't tried one before. You'll have to figure out what sounds more convincing coming from your own mouth, but maybe you could try a variation on the following: "I just want to try one, that's all. They're kind of fun, and they certainly can't hurt."

Be prepared to answer some silly questions. "What kind of disease do you have?" Say the truth in a straightforward manner, "None."

As one of our testers said, "Since it seems more likely that the person getting fucked is at more risk of getting AIDS than the person doing the fucking, the guy getting fucked has the right to say, "Hey, look, if you want to fuck me, you're going to have to wear this."

There are more diplomatic ways of saying it, of course, and if your partner still balks, you could try engaging in mutual masturbation instead. And if everything's right, then lust will win out.

And remember, they really aren't that bad, and they can be kind of fun.

© AIDS Committee of Toronto, Box 55, Station F, Toronto, Ontario M4Y 2L4.

Courtesy of Wellness Networks.

© 2005 LINQ Communications