Talking With Young People About HIV Infection and AIDS

Young people today often face tough decisions about sex and drugs. Most likely, you will not be with the children you care about when they face these choices. But if you talk to them about decision making and AIDS prevention now, you can help them resist peer pressure and make informed choices that will help protect their health, now and for the rest of their lives.

Think of yourself as a counselor

When talking with a young person about HIV infection and AIDS, think of your role as that of counselor, advisor, coach, best friend, or guide. Your goal: to help a young person learn how to make smart decisions about how to act in a healthful manner and avoid infection with HIV.

Tips for starting a conversation

You can start talking about HIV infection and AIDS at any time and in any way you choose. If you find it awkward to bring the topic up, you can look for cues that will help you. Here are some examples:

The Media. You can find plenty of cues in the media, which give HIV infection and AIDS a lot of attention. Look for stories about AIDS and advertisements about HIV prevention on television, on the radio, in newspapers, and in magazines. Start a conversation by commenting on one of them or asking a young person how he or she feels about it.

Deciding what young people need to know

As an adult who knows the young people you will talk with, you are in the best position to decide what they need to know about HIV infection and AIDS.

Think carefully about their knowledge and experience. How old are the children? How much do they already know about HIV infection, AIDS, and other related subjects, such as sex and drug use? Where have they gotten their information? From friends? School? Television? You? Is it likely to be accurate?

Also ask yourself these questions: Is it possible that the young people you will be talking with are sexually active? Have they tried drugs? Do they spend time with people who do these things? .

In addition, consider your family's religious and cultural values. Do you want to convey these in the conversation? How will you get them across?

These are important questions. Answering them will help you stress the information that the young people in your life most need to know.

School. Ask a young person what he or she is learning in health, science, or any other class about HIV infection and AIDS. Use the answer to launch your conversation. .

Community. Local events, such as AIDS benefits or health fairs, can serve as handy conversation starters. You might even propose going to such an event with a young person as an educational experience.

Children may ask. Don't be surprised if a young person asks you directly about HIV infection and AIDS. You can also use young people's questions about related topics, such as dating or sex, to lead into a conversation about HIV infection and AIDS.

How to keep the conversation running smoothly

It can be a challenge. Talking about HIV infection and AIDS can be difficult. You may feel uncomfortable just thinking about it. That's understandable. If you are nervous or embarrassed, don't be afraid to say so. Bringing your feelings into the open can help break the tension. Besides, a young person will sense your uneasiness even if you don't mention it.

Review the facts. You don't have to be an expert to talk with a young person about HIV infection and AIDS. But you should understand the basic facts so that you will deliver the right information. This guide will help you become familiar with the key facts. Talking about the facts with another adult may help you feel more comfortable as you prepare to talk with young people. .

Step into a young person's shoes. What kinds of things did you do when you were the age of the young person with whom you plan to speak? How did you think? The better you understand a young person's point of view, the more effectively you'll be able to communicate. Also thinking of some important differences between the world a child grows up in today and the one you grew up in can help you make your discussion timely and relevant.

Have a mutual conversation. A conversation is an exchange of ideas and information, not a lecture. Encourage the young person with whom you speak to talk and ask questions. Ask about his or her thoughts, feelings, and activities. Show that you want to learn from a young person just as you hope he or she will learn from you. .

Listen. Listen to the young person with whom you speak as closely as you hope he or she will listen to you. Stop talking if he or she wants to speak. Give him or her your full attention, and make eye contact.

Be upbeat. Try to show a positive attitude as you lead the discussion. A critical, disapproving tone can prompt a young person to ignore you. .

Don't get discouraged. Young people often challenge what they hear from adults. If a young person questions what you say, try not to get into an argument. Encourage the young person to check your information with another source, such as the National AIDS Hotline (1-800-342-AIDS). You can also show him or her some of the information in this guide, especially the handout for his or her age group. If your first conversation is cut short for any reason, don't give up. It is important to try again.

Smart decisions: Young people can make them with your help

Even though young people may not ask for it, they often want guidance from adults. You can offer guidance to the young people you care about by helping them develop the skills to make smart decisions -- decisions about their education, their social life, their health. Just as important, you can help young people to understand that they have the ability -- and the responsibility -- to make the key decisions that can prevent the spread of HIV and AIDS. .

Young people do make decisions. Young people often feel they have no control over their lives. Adults tell them when to go to school, when to be home, when to go to bed, and when to wake up. It's important to help them see that they make decisions about their lives every day, such as what music they listen to and who they spend time with. Point out that they also make -- or will make -- tough choices with serious consequences about sex and drugs.

Cause and Effect. Many young people do not fully understand the direct relationship between their decision and the consequences that may result. In your role as a counselor or guide, you can help them see that thoughtful decisions can bring them direct benefits and save them from harsh consequences, such as HIV infection and AIDS. .

Recognize Peer Pressures. Young people's decisions are often strongly influenced by pressure to conform with friends and acquaintances. Peer pressure can also cause young people to act on impulses rather than to think through their decisions.

© 2005 LINQ Communications