Deciding What to Say to Teenagers

Teens need to know a lot more about HIV infection and AIDS than do younger children. Teens are more likely to face choices about drug and alcohol use, and sex.

Because HIV is spread through sexual intercourse or sharing drug needles and syringes, teens need to learn how to make decisions that keep themselves and others from being infected with HIV. Because alcohol and drugs can cloud thinking, teens need to learn that using these substances can cause them to make decisions which can put them at risk. .

Like younger children, teens also must learn to distinguish myths from facts about HIV infection and AIDS. They need to learn about the issues that the disease poses for society, such as the importance of opposing prejudice and discrimination. Discussing all of these things will help equip teens to make decisions that can prevent the spread of HIV infection and AIDS.

In a conversation with a teen, consider including the following points about making decisions, HIV infection, and AIDS:

Becoming infected through sexual intercourse

Many teenagers are sexually active. Sexual intercourse with an infected partner is one way to become infected with HIV. Avoiding sexual intercourse is one sure way to avoid infection with the virus. In deciding what you want to say to a young person about sex, you may want to consider these ideas:

Delay Sexual Intercourse. You may want to bear in mind that the idea of delaying sexual intercourse conflicts with the many sexual messages young people encounter every day on television, in movies, at school, and from friends. Many young people conclude that "everyone is doing it." .

By discussing the benefits of delaying sexual intercourse, you can help a young person make a wise and informed decision about when to become sexually active. You may wish to emphasize the following benefits of delaying sexual intercourse:

How to avoid risky situations

Even young people who truly intend to delay sexual intercourse can have trouble refusing strong persuasion. You can help them succeed by talking with them about how to anticipate and avoid situations in which they might be pressured to have sex.

For instance, pressure can arise when two people are alone at one of their homes or in a car parked on "lovers' lane." Tell young people that when such a situation occurs, they can refuse verbally, or they can simply leave. If they cannot walk home, they can call a friend or a parent to pick them up. Advise them to have change with them at all times so that they will be able to use a public telephone. .

Explain to them that no one has the right to force them to have sexual intercourse, and then tell them some effective ways to refuse. You may want to consider the suggestions in the following section.

How to say no to risky activities

Young people will be more likely to refuse activities that place them at risk for HIV infection if you suggest some effective ways to say no.

For instance, when you talk about sex and HIV infection, discuss ways to say no to sex. You might suggest some of the following examples, or use your own.

Ask the young people you talk with to think of some of their own ways to say no and to practice them with you.

What can they do instead?

Only telling young people what they shouldn't do can make a parent sound very negative. It will be helpful to discuss some risk-free alternatives. Young people will be better able to choose safe behaviors if you tell them ways to express their romantic feelings without risk of HIV infection.

You can make a list of these activities and review it during your conversation. Ask the young people you talk with to suggest some of their own ideas.

If you think a teen is sexually active

Short of abstaining from sex, the best way to protect oneself from sexually transmitted diseases, such as HIV infection, is to have sex only with one faithful, uninfected partner in a long-term relationship.

It is crucial that people understand that the more sexual partners they have, the greater their risk of getting a sexually transmitted disease, such as HIV. .

You can also help young people avoid dangerous sexual decisions by stressing that young people should avoid making decisions about sexual intercourse while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs. These substances cloud judgment and lower inhibitions, and people with clouded judgement are more likely to take sexual risks that will increase their chance of HIV infection. .

You may wish to discuss the importance of using a condom, although use of a condom is not a foolproof method. Such discussion may help young people make wise decisions that will reduce the risk of HIV infection during sexual intercourse. Condoms provide a barrier and, if used correctly, greatly reduce the risk of infection with sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV. People who decide to be sexually active outside a mutually faithful, long-term relationship with an uninfected partner should understand the importance of using a condom every time they have sexual intercourse.

Common Questions, Accurate Answers

For more detail information about how to use a condom, read the part of this guide called "Common Questions, Accurate Answers."

. Preventing HIV transmission caused by needle sharing

HIV often spreads among people who share needles and syringes. If you know young people who use needles for a medical reason (such as people with hemophilia or diabetes), make sure they use and dispose of their needles properly. Needles should be used only under a doctor's order and should never be shared.

in your role of counselor or guide, it is vital that you urge young people not to use drugs. Many drug users face a short, bleak future -- jail, hospitalization, or an early grave -- and drug use increases their risk of HIV infection.

If you talk with a young person about drug use and HIV infection, talk about ways to say no to drugs. You might suggest some of the following ways, or use examples of your own: .

Ask the young people you talk with to think of their own ways to say no to drugs and practice them with you.

© 2005 LINQ Communications